Before I get into how overwhelmed with creativity I am, I have a small gripe. Today was the first time I’ve seen Nanny since she moved into the nursing home. The visiting hours are difficult for someone with a severe sleep disorder like me — 10:00am to 12:00pm, then 1:00pm to 4:00pm. I’ve been trying to wake up in time every day, but when you’re not falling asleep until after 8:00am, it becomes almost impossible. Still, it’s a first-world problem, and I should just force myself to get up, which is exactly what I did today.
The nursing home itself is really lovely. It’s small but has beautiful grounds, and Nanny has a nice view from her window. I couldn’t take too many photos because I didn’t want anyone to think I was snooping around, but below is a leadlight panel that I think could have been more colourful, and a little flower arrangement I spotted in the foyer.
Nanny was utterly miserable today. She cried a lot, and she really struggled to speak. It absolutely guts me seeing her like this. She has her TV from home in her room, and she said that’s basically all she does now — just watches TV. I know she had a lot of visitors today, all family, and that kept her busy for a while, but she still seemed bored and deeply unhappy.
So here’s my gripe. Her granddaughter — my friend, who I’ve been calling Rebecca — lives in a tiny two-bedroom unit. She has schizoaffective disorder and needs an enormous amount of support herself, including frequent admissions to the Adelaide Clinic. She’s so complex that her last psychiatrist actually discharged her, and no one else will take her on. She’s also dealing with severe physical health issues at the moment — serious enough that she had to have an MRI, which thankfully came back clear.
And yet today she messaged me saying she wants Nanny to move in with her, and that she’ll quit work and look after her full-time.
For some reason, that really annoyed me.
First of all, her mother would never allow it — and I can’t help but wonder if that’s why she said it. Is it easy to make grand declarations when you know the answer will always be no? And even if she genuinely believes she could manage it, what exactly is Nanny supposed to do when Rebecca is in the Adelaide Clinic? Or when she’s in the emergency department in the middle of the night thinking she’s had a heart attack? Who looks after Nanny then?
It just made me so mad. It would be incredibly unfair on Nanny. She needs 24-hour care, and deep down she knows that too. She’s miserable, but she’s also aware that she needs to be where she is.
As for Rebecca, I was polite but honest. I told her I think that situation would end badly. But because I’m not family, I have no real say. I just have to sit with the frustration.
Anyway — that’s enough of that.
I’ve suddenly become overwhelmed with creativity, and I’ll tell you why. I’ve always known that AI could generate images, but I had no idea just how far it had come. It’s literally amazing — I’ve been able to generate visual versions of so many of my ideas. I would never use an AI image as my own artwork, but the beautiful thing is that I can create an AI image and then use it as a reference point, blending my own thoughts, visions, and style with what the AI produces.
For example, I had this idea about creating images of Neanderthals using modern-day phallic tools — things like lipstick or even a cigarette. I’m not sure if either of those technically counts as a “tool,” but they’re definitely phallic. And cigarettes, honestly, have to be the ultimate evil tool.
Lucy looks a lot like a chimpanzee — even more so than the Neanderthals — but you can really see how amazing AI is. It literally brought my ideas to life.
Like I’ve said twice already in this post, I feel overwhelmed with creativity because the possibilities are endless. I know some artists are creating work with AI and openly disclosing that they used it. I would always disclose it too, but I wouldn’t use the AI version as my final artwork.
As I said, I’d use it as a reference — a hand here, a piece of clothing there.
I’m so excited just thinking about it. I have to go and create some more images.
Thanks for reading!
